Noise

The noise level in my house at any given moment is just under the decibels produced during the last two minutes of a tied LSU game.  I think that my children were born slightly deaf.  I can't think of any other explanation for their need to scream.  Sure, they passed the newborn hearing screening.  Something must have happened on the way home from the hospital. Every one of my sweet newborn angels began screaming that first night home and so far none have stopped.  They yell at each other even when they are happy.  They yell at each other when they are sad.  Let's not even bring up when they are mad because it just might surpass those energetic LSU fans.  Because everyone is so loud, the TVs must (and I mean must) be turned up to ear-splitting levels.

In addition to apparent select deafness, my children also have an unbelievable ability to tune out what they do not want to hear.  Three TVs blaring, radios, iPods, and screaming siblings are no match for my phone conversations.  The other day I made a phone call from my closet.  Once I emerged two children asked me if we were really going to the park that day.  Both children had been eating breakfast in the kitchen which is four rooms away.  I am not sure how they can hear about upcoming plans made in whispers while hiding but not my face to face instructions.  My commands (demands) seem to be sucked up by the noise with assurances that I was not heard which is why the task was not completed.

I have tried to find solutions to stop the noise.  We do not watch TV during the week.  By we I mean the children because Jason and I earned the right to zone out using reality TV once everyone is in bed.  We made a family rule that the TV volume level can not go above 24.  The big ones always blame higher levels on the little ones knowing that they can't count.  We constantly remind the loudest of the screamers to quiet down.  I usually wait until I can't take it and yell something like, "We don't yell in this family!".  I already know the absurdity of that statement but a person has to do what a person has to do.  Trust me I am not the first one to use the "do as I say not what I do" tactic.  I bet it didn't work for the others either.